Sunday Oct 23, 2016
10:15 AM
- mold /energy
- fungal
- immune
- spiritual
- work towards being happy
- bitterness
- frustration
- hopeless
- abandonment
- fear
- helplessness
- a curse to my back, shoulders
- trust
1959:
I was 9 months old, when my mother abandoned us. My sisters were just a few
years older than me. Thank goodness my father came home for lunch that day…
1963:
I lived my grandparents until I was almost 4. My father would come every
weekend to see us, it was just 30 miles away.. And then we went
and lived with him , within a year he remarried a woman he had dated for
2 years without telling us girls. So the day we moved into the house with her,
was the first day we had ever met her. She had a daughter my age, her name was
Debbie…
1964:
We pretty much just lived with her, my father had started his own oil
company and traveled all the time.
I think she took her madness out on us… She was mean, by hitting us, yelling
and did nothing good for us… In fact I was so afraid of her, I can remember
being in 5th grade, sitting at my desk in school, convincing myself
if I worry really hard, then nothing will happen to me. I must have seen some
kind of pattern about worrying and not getting hit, so I taught myself
literally how to worry in the strongest way… In which I became a pro at…
(so
can you see a pattern beginning of abandonment, helplessness feeling, hopeless,
frustration, low energy, sensitive, spiritual heart, bitterness, un balanced, FEAR
& TRUST…)
Lived
with them in such a awful situation up until I was 13. My sister Patty ran away
from home, she said she had had enough, which lead Janie telling her she had to
go live with our never knew, forgotten real mother… I went with her, because I
didn’t want her to be alone. So my oldest sister stayed. She was in High school
at this time, And I didn’t want to be left there alone with her either…
So
in 1971 we went to live with our estranged mother. That was a bad mistake, so
buy the time I was 16, I decided
that getting married (1975) would end all this drama, and thought I had found
true love..
I
had 2 daughters in this marriage. Which it ended in 1979…
In
1980 I married again, and completely feel in love.. Was married
in the Salt Lake Temple, and thought that I would never have to deal with trust, and unhappiness ever again.. I didn't realize that it could all be taken away someday. Then alcohol and many other
things destroyed what I thought was going to be the fairytale ending… That would end in 2001…
During
this marriage something significant happened to me, that changed everything in
my body, spirit and mind… I was 25
years old, and had just given birth to my youngest daughter Nichole. She was 3
months old when a girlfriend of mine came to visit… It wasn’t unusual for her
to bring some party fun, like coke, and mushrooms. My husband was a avid user
of pot, daily… They talked me into taking some of the mushrooms.. Worst mistake
of my life… In 1983 I was put in a
bed for the night while everyone else partied.. Occasionally they would come in
and check on me, and I do remember telling them to go, and yelling at them,
cant you see I am dead… I was looking down on myself as they came in.. I was in
the state of mind of being dead for over 6 hours… When I finally came down, I was taken to
the hospital, where they kept me, and taught me how to eat again, and to
control my bowls again.. Because I thought I was dead, My body organs believed
it, and shut down…
During
my appointment with Kathy, she said that something awful happened to me when I
was 25.. Or it was between 25 to 30.. She asked me what had happened, and I
couldn’t think of what it could have been. I thought of the mushroom incident, but
let it go I my mind. It wasn’t until after the call that I sat down and really
thought about the dates, and I was exactly 25 years old when it had happened..
She
also had spoke to me about mold being a strong issue of energy.. in which I
connected that to the mushrooms.. She knew nothing of this , about my life..
And the rest could become a novel… I hope to add more to this..
She
did many clearings with my back and shoulders. I came down with frozen
shoulders, both of them 2 years ago. Now I deal with Tinnitus in my ears. Due to
fungal, spiritual, immune, sinuses, hopeless, abandonment, frustration, a curse
to my back. (from laying on my back believing I was dead) .. This all makes
perfect sense…
She said something amazing to me towards the end of my session.. She said until I can believe in myself, and have trust and not live in fear, she can sustain me with these beliefs until I can hold them myself... Beautiful Angel....
And this just hits the tiniest bit of my life, there is so much more to undo, but for now, I have a place to start and begin my healing journey..She also recommended a few things for me to take..
She said something amazing to me towards the end of my session.. She said until I can believe in myself, and have trust and not live in fear, she can sustain me with these beliefs until I can hold them myself... Beautiful Angel....
And this just hits the tiniest bit of my life, there is so much more to undo, but for now, I have a place to start and begin my healing journey..She also recommended a few things for me to take..
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